Men's Coach · Gottman Trained
You already know what's wrong. You just can't stop doing it.
You can see the pattern. You just can't seem to break it. I help men close the gap between insight and action.
Book a Free Call
30 minutes. No pitch.
You can see the pattern. You just can't seem to break it. I help men close the gap between insight and action.
Trusted by men ready to do the work
You're one person at work and another at home. You tell yourself this is normal. Everyone does it. But the distance between those versions of you is growing, and the people closest to you can feel it.
You see the pattern. You name it. You swear this time will be different. Then three weeks later you're back in the same argument, the same avoidance you promised yourself you'd stop. You have plenty of insight. What you don't have is a way to act on it.
You're tired in a way that sleep doesn't fix. Not burned out from working too hard. Drained from holding it all together, performing instead of being, spending energy on an image that doesn't match what's underneath.
None of this means you're broken. You've been relying on awareness alone, and awareness without structure doesn't change anything.
"I know this problem from the inside."
I spent years being the guy who could explain his own patterns perfectly and still repeat them. I had the psychology background and the vocabulary. None of it stopped me from staying in a relationship that was killing me or avoiding the hard conversations I knew I needed to have.
What changed was building a practice that forced me to act on what I already knew. That's what I do with the men I work with now.
10 yrs
Married
20+
Years entrepreneur
Psych
Background
L2
Gottman Certified
Same arguments, same distance, same hollow feeling after
More books and podcasts, more insight that doesn't land
Another year of being the smartest person in the room who still can't get out of his own way
You stop performing and start being the same person everywhere
The patterns that used to run you become choices you make consciously
Your relationships get honest, and honesty turns out to be less scary than pretending
We figure out what's actually driving the pattern, underneath the story you tell yourself about it. I ask questions most people won't ask, and I won't let you hide behind clever answers. You'll leave the first conversation knowing what's been running the show.
Knowing the pattern isn't enough. We build specific practices that move you from understanding to doing. This isn't "try harder" advice. It's a system designed around how you actually work, your blind spots, and the specific ways you sabotage yourself.
Weekly sessions where we put the work into your real life. Your relationships, your decisions, the daily stuff. By week 12, the patterns that kept pulling you back have lost their grip. You're not forcing yourself to be different. You just are.
Three ways to start, depending on how much support you need.
A short call to see whether working together makes sense.
A 60-minute session you can book weekly or monthly, depending on the support you need.
12 weeks of focused work to break the patterns that keep you stuck between knowing and doing.
I finally understand why I kept repeating the same patterns. Lesly didn't just tell me what was wrong. He showed me how I was creating it. And more importantly, how to stop. This work changed everything.
Michael T.
Founder · San Francisco
Most coaching gives you a plan and hopes you follow it. I work on the reason you don't follow plans. We go after the patterns underneath, the ones that make you repeat the same cycles even when you know better.
Most men feel a shift in the first conversation. Something clicks that they've been avoiding. Real change shows up over 8-12 weeks as new patterns replace old ones. It's practice, and it works.
That's what the free call is for. We'll talk honestly about where you are. If coaching isn't the right move, I'll tell you. I'd rather point you in the right direction than sell you something you don't need.
I have psychotherapy training, including Gottman relationship therapy, but this work is coaching, not therapy. We focus on patterns, behavior, and change in your real life rather than diagnosis or clinical treatment. If what you need is therapy, I'll tell you. If you understand your problems and need help actually changing, that's where I come in.
You're ready if you're tired of the same patterns repeating and insight alone hasn't been enough. You don't need to have it figured out. You just need to be honest about where you are.
I pull from depth psychology, cognitive and behavioral approaches, systems thinking, Stoic philosophy, and Gottman research. I don't pick one framework and force everything through it. I use what works for your situation.
You quit drinking and expected relief. Instead, everything got harder. Here's what's actually happening.
PatternsWhy do smart people keep walking into the same harmful situations? It's not bad luck.
RelationshipsYou're responsible for managing your own emotions, not your partner. Here's why that changes everything.
30 minutes. No cost. A real conversation about what's keeping you stuck and what it would take to move.
Book Your Free CallLimited spots each month.
